No Laptop for Freelancing in Pakistan – What to Do

That is genuinely hard. You want to work, you want to learn, you want to earn — and the one thing you need most is out of your control. Feeling stuck like this, watching hours slip away when you could be building something, is frustrating in a way that wears you down. You are not lazy, and you are not making excuses. You have the drive, but you do not have the tool, and that is a real problem, not a personal failure.

What you can try right now

• Use your phone for the theory part. You cannot edit video on a phone the same way, but you can watch tutorials, read documentation, and plan your projects. Web development can actually be learned on a phone — there are coding apps and browser-based editors that let you practice HTML, CSS, and JavaScript. It is not ideal, but it keeps you moving forward while you wait for the laptop.

• Ask for a fixed schedule, not more hours. Instead of asking your sister for "more time," ask for a predictable slot — say, 7 to 9 PM on weekdays. When you know exactly when the laptop is yours, you can plan around it and stop feeling anxious about when it will come. People often say yes to a clear request when "more time" feels vague.

• Look for shared spaces that might have a computer. Some small coworking spaces or libraries in Pakistan offer computer access for a very low fee. Even once a week for a few hours can change your pace. Also check if any friend or cousin has an old laptop they are not using — sometimes people have one lying around and would lend it if they knew how badly you need it.

• Save for your own laptop, even slowly. Put aside whatever you can, even small amounts. A basic second-hand laptop that can handle video editing and web development is not out of reach if you save steadily. In the meantime, treat every minute you get on your sister's laptop as a focused work session — no scrolling, no distractions. That two hours can count for a lot if you go in with a clear plan.

You are not depressed because you lack motivation. You are depressed because you have the motivation and nowhere to put it. That is a different kind of pain, and it matters that you see the difference. Keep learning on your phone, keep asking clearly for what you need, and keep your eyes open for a machine of your own. It will come, inshallah. And when it does, you will already know what to do with it.

Zara is here to talk whenever the frustration gets too heavy. You are not alone in this.